Confronted- A LornaNicky story
by StaySei
Summary: After thinking about the situation between them both, Lorna and Nicky come to a few realisations and go in search of the other to seek answers.
1. Chapter 1

1.

Lorna huffed as she paced up and down her bunk, she was hurt, annoyed, angry. Nicky, for the umpteenth time, had managed to get under her skin and push all of her buttons, she was pushing her with no resolve.

Jones had taught her to channel her energy, to try and manifest her negative thoughts into positives, to let the 'bad' wash over her, but for the past few weeks, none of that had been working, and was getting considerably worse. Lorna always tried to be upbeat, positive, chipper, she had a long sentence and wanted to make the most of it, use the time wisely and learn something from it, she had Christopher and the wedding to think about. She frowned at the two thoughts. Planning a wedding was every girls dream..there was no harm in that one! She enjoyed reading the magazines, it was an escape for her. Of course she knew what the other girls were telling her, that he'd most likely left and moved on, that her wedding was merely a fantasy. But Christopher was the man she took the fall for, the man who was (still?) engaged to, he was supposed to love her back, they were supposed to be happy, not him living the high life whilst Lorna was locked up. She knew this, she wasn't some naive little child like the rest of the girls thought, hope is what she called it, and she wanted to hold onto that for as long as possible, it made the days more faster and bearable. She was dealing with it in her own time.

Nicky, she was drilling it into her, she was telling her what she already knew, she called her stupid, deluded. Saying she gave up a sure thing with her. Lorna honestly didn't know whether to frown or smirk at the thought, she was good to her, she looked after her, and her needs! She was the one person inside who put her first and thought about her feelings, and not their own, in essence, she was everything Christopher wasn't...there. She was exciting, unhinged, intelligent. She liked the knowing what didn't come next with her, the danger, come excitement of doing things in places she shouldn't. All of it, it's what drew her to her. And what kept her there, she didn't know, but she didn't want to lose that, she couldn't. When she heard of Nicky's Christmas 'present' for Alex, she felt sick. She didn't know what to do, or how to react, and since then, the situation between them both had been hostile. Nicky was still angry about the Christopher 'delusion' as she called it, and Lorna, had less patience than she normally had with the girl. She had to talk to her, it was the only logical option left, say whatever needed to be said, do whatever needed to be did. She was drawn, and she wanted to stay. That's when the revelation hit her, she wanted Nicky, all of her.

And with that, she headed towardsNicky's bunk...


	2. Chapter 2

2.

Nicky was led in bed, eyes closed, listening to one of the personal radio players which had been provided for the inmates use. A song she recognised began to play; Melissa Etheridge's 'The Weakness in Me.' Lorna had once mentioned that it reminded her of the situation between them both. Nicky ripped out the earplug and threw the player to the floor, not caring about the damage. She didn't want to be reminded of Lorna, she was mad, she wanted to stay mad for a while- she didn't know what to do otherwise. If it was anybody else acting like Lorna, she'd call them an idiot, but because it was her, Lorna, it was just another one of her quirks. Endearing is what Nicky thought she was, she admired the fact that Lorna could believe in something despite the odds- made even harder whilst in jail. She had an innocent view of the world, always looking for the good in people and doing her best by anyone. As much as the thought made her sick, she was being loyal to the one person who fucked her over. Nicky often thought about what a woman like Lorna was doing with a girl like her. She could have absolutely anybody she wanted, yet she continued the 'encounters', each time getting less about the sex and more about the affection. She always thought of herself as beneath Lorna, smirking at the innuendoed thought that crossed her mind, but in the literal sense, she felt as if Lorna was too good for her. She was an ex-addict locked up with no hope and no future, Lorna came in and changed that for her, she felt wanted, she had someone who cared for her and could care for back.

Recently, the situation between them both had become hostile, bitter words, snarky looks, avoiding each other whenever possible. Nicky couldn't take it. She didn't want any arguments or conflict with anybody inside, and especially not with the one person she was closer to than anything. Even if nothing would happen between her and Lorna again, she didn't care, she just wanted her back, in her arms, to listen to nonsensical ramblings of the West Side Story, anything. And the constant wedding talk, she would just have to learn how to deal with it. She jumped from the bed, stubbing her toe in the process and cursing herself, she was just about to exit her bunk when she walked into somebody.

"Watch it!" Nicky shouted, before turning around and realising who it was that she walked into.

"Lorna?..."


	3. Chapter 3

The two women looked at each other, neither daring to speak first. Lorna was afraid of opening her mouth incase she was shut down and being accused of being this or that. Looking at Nicky stood before her, she wondered why she bothered coming and turned to make an exit. Nicky grabbed hold of her wrist and pulled her back inside.

"Seriously?! You were gonna leave?! Nicky looked upset, what was the point in coming here to leave just as quickly?

"I, I..." Lorna stumbled, she should have thought it through, she went to Nicky's bunk on impulse, and now faced with her, she was lost for words.

"I have something to tell you..."

"Me first." Lorna removed her wrist from Nicky's hand and sat on the bed, signalling for her to follow. Nicky sat alongside her, leaving a gap between them both, usually, they'd be joined at the hip, or cuddling in some form. "I know."

"You know?" Nicky quirked an eyebrow.

"Christopher leaving, not being there. It's the only explanation Nick. Of course I knew, I did after a few months when he stopped replying to my letters and ignoring calls." Lorna stopped to choke back a few tears before carrying on, "It was nice to believe you know? To think I had something, a life after I get released. The other girls, you, calling me naive, a child, stupid, it wasn't nice, it hurt."

Nicky saw the look in her eyes, it was true, and Lorna was hurting, coming here and saying this, mustn't have been easy for her.

"I'm sorry..." Nicky placed her hand upon Lorna's arm and stroked the spot that she know she liked. "I was an assole, I was frustrated, I saw you going after something that wasn't there, I just didn't want you to get hurt in the long run. I wanted to protect you and tell you everything would be ok. But the constant infatuation with Christopher, the wedding, I didn't know what to do, I became snappy, I pushed you away, I turned into the other girls and said things I shouldn't. I don't deserve you, or your kindness."

Lorna sat, perplexed. She came to apologise, yet she was being apologised to? Nicky felt like she wasn't deserving of her?! Of course she was! She had never seen the girl speak like this before.

"You are."

"What?"

"Deserving of me. All of me."

"Lorn. What the hell are you talking about?!" Nicky almost sounded angry, she thought this was some kind of joke on Lorna's half, a way for them to start talking again.

"Me!" Lorna edged closer to Nicky. "You deserve me more than anybody else, and especially not him! I've been foolish Nick, incredibly so. I was so fixated on him, on the stupid fairytale I had planned for us, that I lost sight of more important things, of you, Christ, I almost lost you and I've been beating myself up everyday for it. You deserve good things too, and I swear to God, I will do everything in my power to make whatever I can up to you. There's only thing I want anymore..." Lorna trailed off, letting Nicky fill in the blank. A few minutes had passed, and even with the help of a few suggestive looks from Lorna, she was still none the wiser.

"You really are dense sometimes..."

"I'm not following?"

"You."

A few seconds passed before it clicked. "If that's what I think it means..." Nicky was disbelieving, Lorna wanted her? After everything? Nicky didn't know how to process, or what to do with the confession, noone in her life had said such things, and now she was hearing them from the one person she wanted them to. And for the second time that day, Lorna had rendered her speechless. Lorna merely smiled and nodded her head. The situation must've been confusing for Nicky, she let her process the news in her own time.

"How do I even react to that?" Nicky was the definition of looking like a lost puppy, it was her who usually did the pursuing, she pursued Lorna, Lorna ended it, and now she was here, telling her she wanted her!

"How's about you move to closer to me? And with that, she did, the pair threw their arms around one another, enjoying the simple act of a hug. Whatever would happen, would happen, and whatever would happen within the confinements, they would face head on. But for now, they would merely revel in the new found revelations.

Fin.


End file.
